Being Vulnerable With Money is the First Step

Author: Vanessa Stoykov
Category: Financial Freedom

I’ve been working with the finance industry for over 25 years now. And all the things I have learned about money and people trying to improve their financial situation comes down to this one thing: vulnerability.

What do I mean by that? Well, in order to change, learn, grow and improve your financial life, you have to be vulnerable. You have to be honest about where you are with money right now. What you do know, and what you don’t. Admit what you don’t understand, and where you think you need help.

This sounds easy, but it is much harder than it looks. Our society has conditioned us to not talk about money (at least with honesty). We try and look our best to the outside world, and most of the time don’t show our soft underbelly. We don’t want other people knowing our business – and even in wealthy circles, it is considered vulgar to talk about money.

So how do we improve and learn from others? How do we ask for help in a world that has conditioned us to think we should know what we are doing? And how do we understand technical terms and jargon that the finance industry presents to us, that we don’t really understand and is, quite frankly, boring?

The key is to be vulnerable. And you can start small. Start by telling the truth to friends. Real friends, not the ones that delight in your bad news to make them feel good about themselves.

Because of what I do for a living, I have always had a very open dialogue with my close friends around money. They know when we are doing well, and when things are tough. And they tell me the same. It brings you closer, allows you to have more empathy and understand their state of mind.

Being vulnerable with friends about your money situation and fears is the first step in being able to improve your situation. Whether it is by seeking out a financial adviser or doing some online learning to hone up on money skills. By admitting the truth to yourself and others, you take the first step toward change.

This doesn’t happen quickly, and nothing worthwhile is easy. But the more you take ownership of your own money journey, and be honest with others that care about you, you can start to really move toward your goals. And you can celebrate when you reach them with people who care.

So take a good hard look at your money. It’s time to get real and get help. You can change things no matter what situation you are in. And being vulnerable enough to admit you need help and want to change is the beginning.

Until next time,

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Each day I wake up excited to inspire everyday people to open up and take control of their money, regardless of their history, goals, or savings amount. About Vanessa >>

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Authors

Vanessa Stoykov

Vanessa has been passionate about writing and storytelling since her days of hiding under the doona with her torch to read after bedtime.
Kathy Skantzos

Kathy is a yoga-loving world traveller who also happens to moonlight as a business journalist and writer. She was the finance editor of news.com.au and the Managing Editor of CEO Magazine (Asia) before joining Vanessa and the evo squad.
Shayne Sommer

Shayne is second dan black belt in karate, and a budding romance writer with a difference. Why? Because she writes romance stories that always have a money lesson.
Antoinette Colbran

Specialising in stories for 50+ women, Antoinette draws from her own experiences to help other women avoid the pitfalls and see the benefits of understanding their money situation.
Michael Crooks

Michael Crooks is a more than 20 year writer and documentary maker who has worked with Time Inc and the BBC, who wants to expose the truth from real victims of financial crime to help others avoid their mistakes.
Kim Payne

Kim Payne has spent the past three decades as a speaker, trainer, business coach, and consultant in financial services. She has worked with and transformed hundreds of brilliant, educated, high achievers who are chronically under-living.
Rebecca Pritchard

Rebecca Pritchard is on a mission to help men and women achieve equality when growing a family.
Antony Perring

Ant is a writer, designer and business builder with a love of food, design and good living. He writes on food and money in an easy to do way.
Julie Hyde

Julie Hyde is a leader of leaders. A disruptor and a powerful people enabler who empowers leaders to make big things happen.
Joshua Pennell

As a Dad to four kids and a business owner, Josh is passionate about family and finances and is known as The Family Finance Guy.
Sid Lal

Sid is a serial entrepreneur who set up his first business when he was still in University. Since 2009 he has been heading Bruce Clay, first in India & more recently in Australia.
Lou Johnson

Lou Johnson believes in the power of sharing stories to build empathy, understanding and connection. Growing up surrounded by books and storytelling, alongside her drive to make a difference led her to a highly successful career in book publishing.
David Rae

Dave is a CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER® professional and has been a financial adviser since 2003. He works with a range of clients and has a strong focus on ethical and sustainable investing.
Natallia Smith

Natallia specializes in assisting pre-retiree single women—whether they are never married, widowed, separated, or divorced—understanding deeply the importance of financial stability during life's pivotal moments such as separation, divorce, retirement, and the loss of a loved one.
Mark Hoy

With over 15 years of experience in financial services, Mark established Wollemi Wealth Management in 2013. His business is built almost entirely on referrals and word of mouth — a testament to the trust, integrity, and long-term relationships he forms with his clients.
Derek Gascoigne

Derek Gascoigne is the State Manager for UniSuper Advice in Victoria and Tasmania. Derek has been with UniSuper for over 15 years, and his career in superannuation and financial services spans 27 years and counting.
Annika Bradley

Annika Bradley is Head of Advice Strategy, Research & Technical at UniSuper. She brings over 20 years of experience across investments and wealth management in both the public and private sectors.
Wayne Leggett

Wayne has been a recipient of numerous industry awards and was one of the first to qualify as a Certified Financial Planner (CFP). He has been heavily involved in industry affairs at the highest level, including serving as national president of the Association of Financial Advisers (now FAAA).
Conrad Francis

Conrad Francis is the Founding Director of Inspired Money, a Perth-based financial coaching and financial planning, mortgage broking and money coaching firm he established in 2011.
Andrew Beks

Andrew Beks is a Chartered Accountant and the founder of Simplified Business and Accounting.